The Fangs of a Restaurant Critic

This is the kind of writing that makes The New Yorker such a pleasure to read. In the magazine's April 5 issue, there is a review of Le Caprice, a restaurant in the Pierre Hotel. The magazine's critic, Lila Byock, calls Le Caprice "a stuffy take on a sceney London institution." She continues:

As on "Made Men," however, meticulous appearances mask trouble; Lutece this is not.

While you're waiting to be seated, you may be tempted by one of those nostalgic cocktails. Don't be: they're as cloying as the Disney ballads tinkling out of the piano.

... On recent visits, [service] ranged from hostile to bumbling to non-existent. After checking in with the host, a diner was chased down by a suspicious employee who seemed to feel she didn't belong. A bartender recited, unmprompted, the ingredients of every cocktail on the menu, as if to prove he knew them.

A waiter, preoccupied with a former "Saved by the Bell" star at a nearby table, briefly materialized only to sweep away a third-full bottle of wine. When asked to leave it, he froze. "It's not a scam!" he protested. At these prices, one might beg to disagree.

Chardo-Nay

Chardonnay can be a very pleasant white wine to drink. Especially if it's produced in France, South Africa or Australia. However, for some time, I have shared the Wall Street Journal's assessment of most Chardonnays that are produced in the U.S.

In June of this year, this Journal review of wines didn't mince words:

. . . U.S. chardonnay, especially under $20, has been lousy for a long time now. In broad blind tastings for this column over the past several years, we have been outraged -- that's not too strong a word -- at the junk that's selling for up to $20.

In an article published a few days ago, the Journal reviewers continued their "tough love" assessment. They wrote:

. . . our tastings have shown that [chardonnay] has fallen to a bad place in the past decade. Most chardonnays these days are simple, sweet, alcoholic and false.

. . . most of the [chardonnays] themselves weren't good good values at any price. They were tgoo often disappointing, with too much oak, too little fruit and little care. Too many tasted like stagnant water, like pickling spices . . .

You may think "ouch," but the Journal is not hyperbolizing. Far too many U.S. chardonnays are just not worth drinking. Period.

Last night, I tossed linguine with fresh lump crab in olive oil, butter, garlic and white wine. And I drank a French chablis with it. It was marvelous. Chablis, of course, is produced from the chardonnay grape. But the very name "chablis" makes many wine drinkers wince because their frame of reference is all of that cheap jug wine that California produced in the 1970s and labeled "chablis."

Yes, that chablis was lousy. But a really French chablis -- easy to find in most wine shops is very pleasant. And not expensive.